Appreciation.......

Sometimes, we will only appreciate something when we lost it.

I lost my dad, he left us 3 years ago. I only realised how much I care of him after he left us. I never know that I do care so much. Maybe this is one of the human nature. We always take things for granted. Never appreciate when we have it. We will only feel bad or regret after we lost it. To my dad, I admitted that I did not spend time with him when he need us the most. I regret on what I have done. As my principle, I never regret on what I have done. This is the only things I feel most regret and guilty. I miss my dad, always. I know it's meaningless, my fault. I don't even have the chance to say sorry. The pain will be with me forever...... till the day my soul gathered with my dad.

When Mr. A knew that I'm sort of seeing someone, he start doing something to grab back my attention. Human nature. He asked me all those questions that started with " If....... " This is irritating. I told him not to ask those questions which do not have the possibility to happened. He asked me why? I said "it's because I do not like to answer it. No point to think on something that will not happened." He keep asking me about SOMEONE. I didn't tell him much. What for?

Why wanted to grab back the attention?? Just to show that you still able to do so? Why telling me this and that when I no longer care? Why never care of me when I'm around? Where are you when I'm down? Can't you remember what have you told me before? Human are forgetful. I'm a forgetful person too... But I still can remember what he has told me.

I never appreciate my dad when he is here. I can't even grab his attention again. I always remind myself... "Appreciate whatever you have now... Life is short but beautiful." Appreciated everything you have. This is what I'm trying to do... everyday, every hours, every minutes, every seconds.... I wish I'm doing it well. I do not want another pain come to me again.. I will try not to let it happened again....

I appreciated you... everyone of you...